Welcome to The Very Daily Weblog of Joshua Blankenship



Wherein Buying Produce in South Carolina Makes You a Social Pariah

  • Juno-esque Checkout Girl: Woah. Somebody’s a healthy eater.
  • Me: We try.
  • Juno-esque Checkout Girl: No, seriously. Are from around here?
  • Me: I’m SO from around here.
  • Bagger Dude: [entering scene] Woah. That’s a lot of fruit and veggie.
  • Me: [sigh]

Sat 09.06.08 (4 comments)

Tagged: Conversation, Life

Techno Viking and Saving Rave

  • Me: http://youtube.com/watch?v=1dJwODowvVY
  • M.A. Turner: i don’t get it.
  • Me: Techo-Viking is interesting, nonetheless
  • M.A. Turner: there’s not really a lot of humorous human activity i don’t understand, it’s the way i am wired, even the most arbitrary of things makes me smile, but this (especially the original) i just don’t understand. it’s so surreal. was this some sort of parade? is the techno track being played on a loud speaker, did these people just show up and start dancing and the audio was dubbed later? is this a joke and preplanned?
  • M.A. Turner: it makes my head hurt
  • Me: In my world, it is a techno parade, spontanteously appearing on a city street
  • Me: and there is a large black man with the world’s biggest boombox strapped to his shoulders in front of the cameraman
  • M.A. Turner: so, ok, i guess i could see that. sort of like, the techno-viking appears from the future like the terminator, and then people just start raving
  • M.A. Turner: he’s not going all jesus, wanting to save the world, he’s not going all terminator wanting to save man, he’s going all german and wanting to save rave
  • Me: yes.
  • Me: YES.

Thu 10.04.07 (8 comments)

Tagged: Conversation, Web Culture

Overheard at the Sufjan Stevens Show

  • Massively annoying girl in front of me: OH. MY. GOD. This is like what, like, heaven is like. I’m not [unintelligible gibberish] kidding you. It’s like… ephemeral.
  • Massively’s slightly disinterested friend: Ethereal. You mean “it’s like… ethereal.”
  • Fanboy Stage Left: I love your band. [pause] All of them.
  • Fratboy Stage Right: I love your body. [pause] All of it.

Thu 09.14.06 (13 comments)

Tagged: Conversation

Office Chit Chat

  • Me: I just got a search referral to my poetry page from Ask.com for “what does a woman mean when she says, I don’t like drama.”
  • Dwayne: It means she’s lying.
  • Everyone: “OOOOOooooooh.”

Tue 07.25.06 (14 comments)

Tagged: Conversation

Emasticated

  • Lanna: How’s not having a car working out for you?
  • Me: It’s not fun. I don’t like having to depend on people for rides. I feel 12. I feel like a little boy. It’s completely EMASTICATED me.
  • Lanna: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Thu 02.03.05 (0 comments)

Tagged: Conversation

Flight Attendant Exchange

  • Flight Attendant: Good morning!
  • Me: Hi.
  • Attendant: Going to Minneapolis?
  • Me: Detroit… but nice try.
  • Attendant: [pause] Dangit! It didn’t even phase you.

Mon 05.17.04 (0 comments)

Tagged: Conversation

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